"I can tell you are young. You still have a light in your eyes."
"I do? You mean it will go away? Does it always go away?"
"Yes, it goes away."
"But, you still have a light in your eyes." I said.
"No, no. I only have it sometimes when I'm with the kids. You have that light still, where every thing is new." She replied.
"You're right about that, there is so much that is new to me." I know that light that's she's talking about. I know I've lost it sometimes in my life. I also know that light doesn't go away just because you reach a certain age. I know ancient people who still have it. It doesn't have to go away. Its a mindset thing and a life style thing. It made me very happy to know that someone commented on the light in my eyes.
Later, at the same party, I was talking to my new swedish friend, Otto, whom I met through couchsurfing. We were talking about how we like to be around people, but we also need space to recharge. And we were talking about what kind of people we did and didn't like to be around. I said, "At least there are some guys here this time for you to talk to." The previous times we'd met, he had hung out with me and my friends, who happened to be all girls those times.
"No, its okay really. I'm used to being in groups with women. If there's at least one woman in a group of men, they'll be okay. Otherwise they don't show their emotions. And I do. They want to appear tough. I don't."
"Is it the same way in the U.S. as Sweden do you think? So far?" (He's only been in the states 3 weeks). I wanted to know his opinion.
"Yes, so far, I think yes."
"Well, that's great you already figured that out and that you are so comfortable with yourself." To myself, I was thinking, he is so unself-conscious. It is my goal to be more like that. Then I added, "I think men can become less tough, maybe as they become older. I mean, my dad is not like that."
"Yes," Otto agreed. "As we become more comfortable with ourselves."