Thursday, October 27, 2011
I went for a hike with James, Adam and Christina last weekend to the top of Pedernal, that flat-backed mountain portrayed in Georgia O'Keefe paintings. So, so beautiful! We camped out along the chama river the night before. In the morning, James and I woke up earlier than everyone else and visited Christ in the Desert Monastery, driving down the dirt road beside the river and the turning cottonwood trees under blue blue sky. We arrived in time to sit in on 20 minutes of the service, followed by silent meditation. I felt like it was exactly what I needed. We noticed a tarantula migrating on the road on the way back.
Poem from earlier in the week:
I'm back to staring at the yellow walls
that bite me if I touch them.
Release me from the halls
running from one end to the other.
Send me peace of mind
and surprises to discover.
I realize I am restless,
Consuming chips and chocolate.
Close those eyes and go to sleep,
Falling deep below the blips of thought,
The requests to know not what,
Into gratitude for the resting and the letting.
I dreamt last night. I was fashioning little log float rafts for 20 people. We were going to head out across the ocean for the next 6 weeks. I hid my camera and belongings up in a palm tree. The place of departure was the same place in a dream a few months ago in which a tsunami slammed ashore and I held onto to a tree, underwater, submerged, until it passed.
I just finished the profoundly thought-provoking book, "Love is Stronger than Death" by Cynthia Bourgeault. Its an incredible account of conscious love and the bond that continues to develop beyond the grave. Here are just a few of the many memorable quotes:
"Hence, the core of all spiritual practice lies in teaching us not to identify with our psychological reactions to everything" (107)
"Dying to self...awakening to self: the two paths exist in creative tension within us" (134)
"Soul work with an authentic soul partner can be messy, untidy, frequently turbulent. The beloved holds a key possessed by no on else, which allows him or her to plunge deeper into the other's psychic realms than any other human being, to unlock dungeons that even the beloved cannot open alone" (138)
"True love demands sacrifice because true love is a transforming force and is really the birth pangs of union at a higher level" (147)
"The very intensity of the desire they have to give all to the other will become the bridge on which they cross from passion to compassion" (150)
"I want it because I think it helps him; he wants it because he thinks it helps me. After a while, who gives what or why doesn't matter anymore, only the giving itself matters" (172)
"Love remains and deepens, but its form changes...it renews itself in a different way. What you really do today is to put your lives in the service of love itself: to let the material of your own selves - your hopes and fears, imitations and shadows, your intimate jostling up against each other - become the friction that polishes you both to pure diamonds" (188 - marriage sermon)
"If the way is opening, keep on walking" (209)